Simply start with Thou and add a word from each column, thou frothy earth-vexing canker-blossom.
Column 1 Column 2 Column 3
artless base-court apple-john
bawdy bat-fowling baggage
beslubbering beef-witted barnacle
Swiped from Lori. 
shakespeare insult kit
21 Sunday Jan 2007
casa azahar 
Thou currish fly-bitten codpiece!
Not you personally az!
Great one!
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Az, thou yeasty pock-marked strumpet!
Glad you appreciated it. Years ago, I had it printed out in my classroom…I would periodically throw one at another teacher — a buddy who loved the bait.
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I’ve always liked obscure insults…by the time the victim has deciphered them, you can be long gone!
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If I thought the people at Orange would understand this stuff I would have let rip during every dead-end phone call I had with them this past week.
Mind you, an English friend of mine used to delight in insulting people in this manner. For example, after receiving appalling service somewhere in Spain he would ask the person ‘Do you speak English?’ and when met with a blank expression would embark on a diatribe of the worst and most colourful language he could think of (all the while with a pleasant smile on his face). Nobody was hurt yet it was somehow quite therapeutic.
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