broken hearted


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broken hearted

I almost hesitate to write this as I know it’s really going to rile up Kate (aka Sledpress) but since my Medical Check List post I thought things were going rather well. Until this morning. After the blood test and ECG results came in my GP requested appointments for me to see a cardiologist and a dermatologist (for my going bald issue) and meanwhile oncology finally got in touch and I have another CT scan on Monday. Today I had the cardiologist at 9 AM, so I was up and out and in a taxi (in the rain) hoping to find something out. Alas… nope. They gave me another ECG when I got to the hospital and then I waited to see the doctor, who ended up remembering me from an appointment several years ago (I didn’t remember her, maybe that was my first mistake).

Anyhoodle, she acted very wary… saying I shouldn’t sit too close to her desk, telling me to turn my head away from her when she listened on the stethoscope. I mean, I get it. She is surrounded by possible sick people all day long, but she truly had no “bedside manner”. And worst of all was that she simply didn’t listen to me.

My reasons for being there were the following: I am short of breath almost always these days, I get that “tight skin” feeling in my arms when I stand up too quickly  (and sometimes also feel a bit dizzy), I also sometimes have tightness in my chest (never actually got to tell her that bit) and, yes, the tachycardia keeps happening. ASSUMPTION was that I was there once again about the tachycardia, but I wasn’t. This is something I’ve had since I was 25 and NO DOCTOR has ever been able to find out why. So I was there because it’s increasingly harder for me to breathe and I get a “tight” pain in my arms and fingers, there’s also a tightness across my lower ribs. Did she listen to me? Did she fuck.
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just breathe, eh?


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4 7 8

I’ve always had this problem. I never breathe enough. Or deeply enough. In fact sometimes I catch myself barely breathing at all, just short shallow panting, and I only become aware of that when I start to feel weird, either physically or emotionally. Then I have to stop and take a few deep breaths.

I’m sure most of you have now heard of the 4-7-8 breathing technique, meant to relax, help you sleep, and even do nice things to your body’s wellbeing. I tried it awhile back and actually couldn’t do it (!). I kept panicking while exhaling for 8 seconds. Then I tried it again this morning and it was like… I’ve GOT this! So I am going to try doing it a couple of times a day, and especially when I wake up in the night.

If you don’t know how it works, here you go. Apparently your tongue should be resting against the roof of your mouth, on the ridge behind your front teeth.

  1. empty the lungs of air.
  2. breathe in quietly through the nose for 4 seconds.
  3. hold the breath for a count of 7 seconds.
  4. exhale forcefully through the mouth, pursing the lips and making a “whoosh” sound, for 8 seconds.
  5. repeat the cycle up to 4 times.

I don’t know why they say you shouldn’t do this more than four times in a row, but apparently you can work yourself up to eight times. Worth a shot. Anyone else doing this?

virtual tapas tour



virtual tour

Got an email around 6 o’clock from a guy called Blake asking if he and his wife could join a tapas tour this evening. And well, aside from the fact that I am not giving tours yet, it was very last minute, even too late for José to get into Sevilla on time (he lives just outside town). So I had to apologise and say no… twice, because he wrote back saying they were vaccinated, etc. But I explained it was too late to organise anything and once again had to say no. Then he wrote AGAIN saying that if I changed my mind to just let them know. And then inspiration struck! I remembered when, a few years ago, friends were visiting and I was hit with a random 24-hour bug. I suddenly had to take to my bed and wasn’t able to meet up with them. Instead we stayed in touch by phone and I told them where to go and what to order. And so I decided to suggest this to Blake (especially as he clearly wasn’t taking no for an answer! 😉 ).

Well, he loved the idea and I set it up like a bit of a mystery tour, sending them map locations of the bars by WhatsApp one at a time, with a list of tapas to order at each one. Meanwhile they sent me photos (and bad jokes courtesy of Blake) throughout the evening. Later he sent me this message.   🙂

One of the best travel experiences I have had, thank you so much again and I can’t wait to write my review tomorrow. Cheers.

I was joking that I could maybe do this full-time, doing 3-4 tours a night sending people to different bars while I stay home and netflix with the cats, but the truth is I can’t wait to get out and about again. This was fun though!