Something I have always wanted to do  is see London at Christmastime, even though some die-hard Londoners like Steve tell me it’s all a bunch o’ nuthin. But I really do love Christmas and all that goes with it, and since getting cancer it does always cross my mind (as it does on every important calendar date) that this might be my last one. And so imagine how thrilled I was when a London-based journalist asked on Twitter if there was someone who would like to house & cat sit over the holidays! I spent days fantasizing about having a house to myself – though with a cat so I wouldn’t get lonely – and being able to work and re-connect with some of the people I met last September. And of course see Steve & Sara and the Hackey Gang again, as well as Lizzie who would be in town for family get togethers. I rationalised the cost of the airfare as a “business expense” (which is actually true) and calculated that I wouldn’t be eating out as much as when I was there last time. Really, the idea was to get lots of work done “at home”, meet up with a few friends and biz contacts, have a couple of nice meals out, SEE THE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS, and then come home again.

Then I found out last night that the house & cat sitting gig is for two weeks, which made me re-think the logistics and especially the cost. Plus Azar has been feeling a bit poorly of late and I thought it would be awful if something happened to him while I was off looking after someone else’s cat. Even though Nog would be here looking after the boys, I’m not sure about him dealing with any sort of health emergency. So I guess I’m resigned to not going now, though I’m still waiting to hear back from the journalist with more info. It feels like being pulled in about ten different directions even though there are clearly only two options. In other circumstances I would jump at this chance because who knows when an opportunity like this will come up again. But the timing just isn’t right. What should I do?