I do sometimes wonder if it’s just a matter of time before I snap. Or maybe that’s what the cancer was all about, and now it’s about to come back. But the bottom line is that it’s just too much. After almost two years of ops and chemo and being off work I was finally getting to where I might start making enough money again to live on, and then I lose the roof over my head. And while I keep getting up every day and doing what I can, I really am not doing very well. I lie awake at night hugging cats and feeling like it’s all falling apart, that I’m slipping into the abyss and there is no way out anymore. It scares me. It bloody well scares the hell out of me.