… and really dreading it.
Last time I had a really bad reaction to the infusion. By the time I got home I felt sick & weak, my tongue was swollen, vision blurry, eyelids were twitching like mad … I ended up heading straight for bed and collapsing. When I told Dr Ana about it yesterday I thought I just needed them to give me an extra bottle of saline solution in the drip at the end, but apparently the solution won’t be so easy…
I’m usually in the chemo chair 2 1/2 – 3 hours, which feels like an eternity. And now the length of time has been upped to 4-5 hours (!!!) to slow down the rate that the poison gets into my system. Damn. Which means chemo days have gone from 5 to 7+ hospital hours. Bleh. This is also going to make it even trickier to find hospital buddies as nobody is going to want to – or be able to – stay that long.
Today Nog will be coming with me at 9.30 in the morning but has to leave for a class at 11.30, so Flor will come to the hospital then to take over the second shift. But she has to be somewhere at 1.30, so Nog will come back after his class and stay with me till it’s time to go home again. If I’m lucky I’ll be back by around 5 o’clock.
Looks like I’m going to have to pack some extra sandwiches.
That’s a bugger :hug:
Wish I lived a bit nearer and could come and be a hospital buddy.
Will be thinking of you and hoping the slower infusion makes things easier for you.
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Second the motion, about the living closer thing. I suppose it doesn’t work to bring along a shaker of Cosmopolitans?
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Crap! And you can’t even play Scrabble on the i-phone. I’d go with you if I could. And I would have taken you back to the hospital when you did that reaction thing last week. Glad to know what it is.
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Room temperature Cosmopolitans would be kinda gross (the “cold problem” starts as soon as the chemo hits my veins), but it’s something to keep in mind for my next week off. I remember quite enjoying them last summer. Used up all the vodka though.
Meanwhile, I’ve been up since 5 am … so much for going in well rested. And I’ve just had a BIG cry (with Nog holding me in his arms) because I really really really don’t want to have to do this!!! I wish there were some brave pills I could take.
Moving into unchartered waters today as I haven’t gone past 3 rounds before. Even though this time has been a bit different – as in more difficult – than last time, the circumstances are also different. Last summer it was understood that I wouldn’t be able to work (still recovering from first op and with another one coming up), and there was always just enough donation money to get by on, so I didn’t have the extra stress of having to find work and not being able to make ends meet. I was able to just take it easy and HEAL, which I know really helped a lot.
Also, I am getting different side effects this time. I am so short of breath that walking and talking at the same time leaves me feeling totally winded … and walking up those three long flights of stairs takes forever! But the scariest new side effect so far is that I can feel the beginnings of neuropathy in my fingers and I am so afraid of it getting worse. Lots of people from the Colon Club have talked about their neuropathy worsening even six months after stopping chemo – some even end up losing their fingerprints (!!!). And the “having something stuck in my throat” feeling is also worse this time round.
Oh look, major whinge. Think I’ll go make those sandwiches now…
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Silverstar, have you got Scramble on your google phone? I’ve noticed that you can play “live” with invited friends using that app. My friend code is 2203 2839 05. Probably won’t be in the chair for another 2-3 hours though.
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You’re entitled to whinge.
But we’re going to get through it.
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Sitting in chemo chair … one of the perhaps less obvious ways that cancer shortens one’s life.
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virtual buddy with some virtual cosmopolitans checking in.
xxx
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Took my own weekly dose of chemo* last night and it’s made me feel a bit crap today.
I’m imagining a-bit-crap X about ten thousand – and wondering how you cope.
I know it’s been said before but if the stuff’s making you feel that bad, it must be kicking the arses of any rogue cells which’ve had the damn cheek to over-extend their stay.
:hug:
*mine is methotrexate to control the RFA
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Oh, sweetheart. I wish you could see what I do. You don’t need any brave pills. Doing something that you *really* *really* don’t want to because you know it’s the right thing to do is the bravest thing of all :hug:
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Guess I shouldn’t be sitting here whining over w*rking late…
Hang in there honey, everything has and end – apart from sausage which has two … (bad translation of a Swedish proverb). Wish you better luck with the aftermath of round four than the previous ones.
Thanks a lot for your recent mails about “how to beat GFW”
*hugs*
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Hi everyone. Just a quick hello. Haven’t been able to get up since I hit the bed when I got home, but “nature” has called so I had to make the effort.
It says 28º on the bedroom thermometre but I’m shivering like crazy (though Nog says my skin is hot to the touch). Took my temperature – 38º. Kinda high. Maybe I’ll call Agustín.
A fellow Twitterer who lives in Seville got in touch this afternoon (I guess after seeing the pics I posted there from the chemo room). After reading my blog he said to get in touch if I ever need a hospital buddy. Isn’t that sweet?
Thanks for being here guys. I really have to go and lie down again. Can read comments from bed on my iPhone though (hint, hint…).
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Just followed the twittery link on this page to the yfrog pictures – and, considering the day you’ve just had, you look fab. That colour is great on you.
I hope you’re snuggled up with The Snibs and not so shivery now.
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I think this is really the first time that I have “experienced” chemotherapy with someone so closely. What a very horrible experience. I can’t believe that I would be any braver than you, there are no pills, just the will to survive and do what you have to.
So, I can’t go to the hospital with you from here, but I have been with you in spirit.
Hope your fever has come down by now.
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Hmm. Time spent in hospitals rarely feels ‘well’ spent, but is often useful. Just a question of making the time pass.
I’m guessing you’re reading like crazy? What kind of thing are you into? Text books, fiction, biography, fantasy, sci-fi, erotica, romance, suspense, horror? DancingTree writes about iPhone stuff and usability etc. nowadays and he tells me that you can easily set up your own e-book folder for the iPhone to sync with, which might allow you a more personal choice for things to read than is provided by apps like Stanza and similar.
And I’m sure like-minded friends, literature-ally speaking (!), wouldn’t mind lending you a few copies via email.
Although I’m also going to start with the Shakespeare app (and a dictionary) when I inherit his iPhone later this summer.
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Hey Az, it sounds ghastly and that’s from thousands of miles away, so I can’t begin to imagine how awful you must feel. I hope the fingers aren’t worsening. Its difficult to even be a virtual hospital buddy for you because of the time difference, but if ever you’re awake in your nighttime and want to chat, email me and I’ll get it on my iPhone 🙂 We can take our minds off it all by discussing hot men in hot TV shows and such vitally important stuff!
And hey, if you didn’t have a cry before something so nasty, you wouldn’t be human – so at least we know you’re definitely not a Cylon, right?!! 😉
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I’ve just googled methotrexate … are you getting any of the bad side effects, Teuchter? Is it helping with the RFA?
Unfortunately, the extent to which chemo makes one feel bloody awful bears no relation to how effectively the drugs are working. Oh well.
The fever seems to be gone now, hmh. And I had a much needed 7-hour sleep, thanks to the drugs. Should be cat napping most of the weekend now.
That’s a terrible joke, dq … keep em coming! 🙂
I’ve been reading so little this year, ismarah. It’s kind of embarrassing. Last year I averaged almost a book a week. This year I’ve barely managed a book a month (and still have to update the 2009 page). I blame the iPhone, of course. Most of my reading is done in bed, either just before sleep or in the wee hours when I can’t sleep. Since Christmas, reading time has been at least halved with me reading blogs, twittering and playing word games on the iPhone. Not sure I could actually read a whole book on it, but it’s worth looking into.
Have you got Skype on your iPhone, woo? At first I thought, “why would I want to put a phone app on my phone??”, but of course it’s a great idea for people like you whose only internet access outside work is your iPhone. I’ll try it out today. My Skype name is azahar.sevilla.
Sara … thanks! *hug*
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Have you tried any of the book apps? Some of them are absolutely fine to read and the pinch zoom really helps if needed.
When I’m in the hospital I tend to read absolute cr@p as it stops my brain from thinking too much – otherwise I obsess like crazy.
(What? Obsessing X amount isn’t crazy, it’s x to the nth power that starts to become an issue).
One app that I quite like for ebooks is available online as well – http://www.ereader.com – it makes things look like pages and is very easy to adjust and run (caveat: I’ve only run it on a mac laptop).
I haven’t found a website that delivers Cosmos just yet other than the crappy magazine, which I was sure you wouldn’t want!
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Would it help if we got on Facebook so we could chat while you’re in the chair? It’s a very long haul.
If I were you I’d give up on books for now and switch to magazines and graphic novels. That’s what worked for me, anyway. Or try Audible.com for audible books, which are very soothing, especially if they’re read by that sexy Alan Rickman!
Have you thought about having one chemo buddy take you to the hospital and wait while they get you hooked up and make sure you’ve got everything, and then another to come and pick you up later? That’s the system I went with, although my sessions were generally no more than four hours long. There’s a limit to people’s patience, it’s true, but even moreso there are limits to your needs and once you’re settled in you should be able to stay put with just nurse supervision, or is Spain’s system quite different?
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Hi, az! I’m just checking in after falling behind in my blog reading again. (I’ve been just wiped out, and not able to even keep up with my work. I feel a bit like I’m coming out of a fog.)
But ugh, I’m sorry to see how rough things are going for you with the chemo. I really wish I could be there. I’d gladly be your chemo buddy. You could kick my ass at scrabble in person.
Speaking of scrabble, I’m not sure what ever happened with the Lexulous website. (I think we were in the middle of a game when the weirdness started happening with changing the board around.) Are you still playing these days? If so, where, and can we play again?
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