I was looking through my photo files from a couple of years ago and came across this. Suddenly I felt a massive wave of sadness and loss, along with an actual physical pain in my heart. But there was also – and is still – so much love there that it’s always hard to feel sad for long when I think of Azar. Which is pretty much every day. Still, this photo made me ache with longing to touch him again. My beautiful boy.