Tag Archives: love

celebrating dan

21 Friday Jan 2022

Posted by in friends, life stuff, love

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dan

[photo by Deb]

Today I “attended” my first virtual funeral. The lovely Dan Jamón died just before Christmas and then I found out about this service that was going to be streamed live and his wife Deb invited me. I really didn’t know what to expect, but planned to be there with a glass of sherry in hand to be a part of this celebration of Dan’s live. And it really was beautiful. Friends talking about Dan, their memories and anecdotes, with lots of music thrown in (I didn’t know Dan was also a musician!) and old photos and videos shown on a big screen. I knew it wasn’t going to be your typical funeral service when the minister started off by quoting Prince…

Dearly beloved
We are gathered here today
To get through this thing called life
Electric word life, it means forever
And that’s a mighty long time

From there on I heard all those lovely stories about Dan (who is mostly known as Norm, whaat?) and although tears had been gently falling down my cheeks this whole time I totally lost it when suddenly they played Angel by Jimi Hendrix while we all sat and listened. No photos or videos, just this song. A song that had meant so much to me when I was, like, 16? What a trigger. I sobbed and sobbed, wishing I’d got to know this wonderful man more, a guy who was actually “too young” to have known this song, or at least to the point of having it played at his funeral. Who was this guy?

As Deb, Dan’s wife and the love of his life, had promised… it was pretty emotional. And I felt so grateful to be included in this beautiful service. It’s left me in a tangle of emotions, and I look forward to welcoming Deb back one day so we can raise a glass to Dan in their favourite city in the world.

annie

08 Wednesday Apr 2020

Posted by in cancer, death & dying, friends

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You came into my life just by chance, and you stayed in my life because you chose to. You wanted to. And unlike with many people I’ve known, your friendship never waivered, not once, not even a little bit.  I smile remembering how you’d tell me “yeah, that’s because they’re assholes”. That meant absolutely everything to me.

Annie, I’ve been sitting by your bedside, so to speak, for these past weeks and riding that rollercoaster with Kenton, during your good days, and the times when it looked like it was all over and then you’d rally yet again. As Kenton put it, you’re as stubborn as a mule and as tough as old boots, and always the strong one while the rest of us are in bits.

And we were in bits many times, and then the next day you’d be up drinking a smoothie at the hospice and chatting away. Oh Annie. It’s been awhile since we were able to talk, but Kenton told me he mentioned me to you the other day and you smiled and said “of course I remember Shawn”. But other times you were barely conscious. And so while this really breaks my heart, of course you couldn’t have gone on like that. I imagine how annoyed you’d be.

I’ve never lost someone I love before, Annie. It’s taken heartbreak to a whole other level. As I said to Kenton, I guess it’s lucky I hardly love anyone so this isn’t likely to happen many more times during what is left of my life.

Silver linings.

My life will not be the same without you my beautiful, loving, smart, funny and fiercely loyal friend. But I know that I am a better person for having known you. And I will never stop loving and missing you. ❤

We love each other and try our best, everything else is meaningless

We hard arsed bitches have to stick together. Fuck everyone else. Love you, Shawn. X

~ Annie

 

love you, london

05 Monday Jun 2017

Posted by in london, love

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After hearing such heart-breaking news over the weekend I was reminded of this day last August. I had spent a lovely afternoon at Borough Market with my lovely friend John @CityJohn. I’d been having a hard time with panic attacks during that visit and that day I had to take an Uber to the market (I’ve always found crossing bridges on foot difficult). But on the way back I promised John I would bravely walk over London Bridge all by myself and send him a photo to prove it. Which I did.

On my last visit to London in April my friend (and flatmate) Peter @SVQconcierge came with me and one day we walked over Westminster bridge together. Not sure I could’ve managed it otherwise. The long line of wreaths along the west side of the bridge were poignant beyond words.

I also took Peter to Arabica, a wonderful restaurant just outside Borough Market. When I’d last been there, having lunch on my own at the bar, I ended up chatting with the most cheerful barman ever, a charming guy called Emanuele. So imagine my surprise when I walked in 9 months later with Peter and he recognized me! He remembered me taking his photo and posting it on my Instagram (Arabica later re-posted it on theirs). And it was Emanuele’s face that came to mind when I read about the amazing staff at Arabica locking its doors and keeping everyone safe inside.

I don’t really know where I’m going with this. Just a bunch of feelings and memories all getting mixed up. So I just want to say that I love you London, and I hope to see you again before too long, and walk over ALL your bridges. xx