Category Archives: health & happiness

still adrift …

19 Thursday Jun 2008

Posted by in cancer, friends, health & happiness, home, hospitals, life stuff

≈ 13 Comments

Yesterday I was supposed to start chemo …

Since my operation in May I have been pretty much been living in limbo. It wasn’t so apparent during the first couple of weeks that I was recovering from surgery, but as soon as started feeling better I also started realising that this was just the first step. I still had to find out if the tumour that had been removed (along with a metre of my colon) was malignant and, if so, whether the cancer had spread.

Two weeks ago I was told the tumour was indeed malignant and a week later I had a CT scan to see if I was ‘clean’ or not. And yesterday I found out that I’m not. Or maybe I’m not. The CT scan showed a small lesion in my liver that may or may not be cancerous. [editor’s note: gaaaaaaa!!!]

I was told I would need a PET scan and if the lesion turned out to be malignant I would then require more surgery, followed by chemo. But in the meantime I was still scheduled to start chemo this Friday (I’d put it off for a couple of days so I could meet nursemyra at the airport today without feeling ill). But it still didn’t make sense to start chemo and then stop it for surgery – if it came to that – and then start all over again a few weeks later.

And so I went down to the nuclear medicine department to see about getting a PET scan. Happily I know some people there so it turned out that I can have a PET scan this Saturday and get the results back by Monday (yay!). And when I told my oncologist this she immediately agreed about putting off the chemo till next week, until we find out if I’m going to need more surgery or not.

So if all goes well and I only need the preventative chemo (fingers crossed!) then that will start on the day after daisyfae arrives, which would also be better timing.

Meanwhile, I’m back in limbo.

chatterbox

11 Wednesday Jun 2008

Posted by in friends, health & happiness, home, hospitals

≈ 5 Comments

This post is dedicated to Bosco, my favourite chatterbox.

You know how I’ve been going on lately about wanting light & fluffy distraction, how I’m not up for having visitors (except Pipocas), and even how I often won’t answer my phone these days? Well, there is another exception to all that and that’s my friend and student Bosco, the 30-year-old son of another student Paloma, who is a good friend of Dr A (aka guspemar).

It all started while I was still in hospital . . .

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life improvement

10 Tuesday Jun 2008

Posted by in health & happiness, life stuff

≈ 8 Comments

I first posted this last summer and thought now would be a good time to remind myself of this rather excellent list of bad habits to consciously avoid. In the ‘never rains but it pours’ department I received some bad news last night that I’m determined not to let drag me down, even though it is seriously going to affect my living situation and future plans come September. All of a sudden getting through the summer and the chemo have become just the first steps of a very challenging time ahead of me. So it’s time to stop feeling afraid and start practicing both good mental and physical health.

Many of our problems come from within our own minds. They aren’t caused by events, bad luck, or other people. We cause them through our own poor mental habits. Here are 10 habits you should set aside right away to free yourself from the many problems each one will be causing you.

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muchas gracias

07 Saturday Jun 2008

Posted by in friends, health & happiness, home

≈ 10 Comments

Just wanted to say muchísimas gracias to all of you for your support. And an extra hug for those who are helping out with donations – you’ve really helped ease some of the extra stress, especially now that it looks like I’m going to be off work most of the summer …

I’ll be starting back with my classes on Monday in an attempt to at least make up the three weeks of classes I owe my students for May, as they were paid for in advance. And Nog has kindly agreed to help me by teaching my morning classes so that I’ll only have to do the afternoon ones. Phew!

For the past week I’ve been getting out for a walk every day. Well, more of a shuffle than a walk, but sometimes I’m out for a couple of hours or more. I’m still feeling a bit fragile and have a tendency to suddenly have to lie down now! but I am certainly making progress.

Well, except that since my appointment with the oncologist last Tuesday I seem to have lost my new found sense of serenity and worldly wisdom (from the ‘every day is a gift’ hospital epiphany) and have instead morphed into an emotional rollercoastering lunatic. I blame being thrown back into limbo for another couple of weeks after I thought I was about to get some real answers about my condition. Ah well, this too shall pass. But I’m telling ya, if one more person tells me to think positive and assures me that everything’s gonna be alright and that I just have to take it one day at a time I refuse to take responsibility for my actions. 😉

To wit, I am still not up to having visitors (except for Pipocas) and often don’t even answer the phone. It always ends up being the same conversation and I’m left feeling exhausted after ‘reliving’ it all again. Light and fluffy distraction is what I crave these days. I think I’m going to make a rule for my students next week that we can talk about anything but the operation and its aftermath.

Oops, time for another nap. Maybe I’m turning into a cat?

Thanks again, everyone! 🙂