So I had two hospital appointments yesterday morning with the two different surgeons (colon and liver) as a check up and revision thing. You will no doubt recall that when I saw the oncologist a couple of weeks ago for my updated prognosis she told me that there wouldn’t be any more surgery and that whatever chemo they put me on next would only be a way of slowing things down and not a cure. And when I asked her to give me a survival time frame if I chose not to have chemo treatment she said it would be more or less a year. So imagine my surprise when I got this news …

My first appointment was with the liver surgeon and I ended up speaking with one of the doctors, Carmen, who had been part of the team during my last operation. My file was open in front of her and when I sat down I couldn’t help but notice that the biopsy report said: FIBROSIS PERITONEAL. SIN EVIDENCIA DE MALIGNIDAD. I just stared at it for a moment and then asked Carmen – “Does that mean what I think it means?” And she said – “The first thing I want you to do is not overreact…” So I said – “Okay, so I won’t open the champagne yet, right?” And she smiled and nodded. Then she turned to Nog (who couldn’t see the file) and told him that the biopsy report on the peritoneal area showed no evidence of malignancy and … oh bless him … his whole face lit up like a Christmas tree! And so she had to start all over again, telling him not to get too excited yet and being very clear that she didn’t want to give us false hope. But I mean, hey – it was the first good news I’ve received since this whole mess started.

After Carmen and the nurse had a look at my scars (which are healing very well) we sat down again and calmly talked over the results. And while it’s still too early to say anything definite – lots of tests still need to be done – if the next CT scan doesn’t show any new tumours elsewhere then there is a chance that they’ll be able to go in and remove the liver tumours. Which means – just maybe – that my cancer might be treatable!

But talk about mixed messages. I’m not actually sure what to believe or how to feel right now.  I told Carmen what the oncologist had said and she was very surprised that she could have come to those conclusions without having seen the biopsy results. Apparently there will be a clinical session before my next oncology appointment (November 12th) and Carmen said she was going to be there.

So basically I’m still going to be in limbo until then, but at least I now have a wee glimmer of hope, which is more than I’ve had for quite awhile. Boy, what a rollercoaster ride . . .