01 Wednesday Oct 2008
Posted in cancer, friends, health & happiness, hospitals, progress
It’s been about nine days since my ‘almost operation’ – is it still considered an operation if they didn’t actually hack into my liver and remove the tumours?. In any case, I’m sure this is why I went home after just two days, as I’m mostly ‘just’ recovering from having a 15″ j-shaped gash cut into me rather than that and my liver being resected. And I seem to be recovering from it quite well. Meanwhile . . .
29 Monday Sep 2008
Posted in cancer, friends, health & happiness, home, love
That’s a little joke present that nursemyra brought me from Australia when she came to visit last June. It’s a ‘summoning bell’ for me to ring whenever I need Nog to do something for me (it also looks like it can be used to open beer bottles), though nursemyra pointed out at the time that it was a little late for me to use as I had already recovered from the colon operation. Little did we know then that there would be more to come . . .
Anyhow, I just wanted to say how much I appreciate Nog because, all joking aside, he truly has been there for me throughout all of this and it’s a real comfort to know that he’s also going to help me through the next however-long-it-takes to get better. I know that sometimes Nog has been almost as scared as me, but he doesn’t let it show and he’s always there to help with anything he can, never hesitating to put me first. But I also know that people caring for a sick person can sometimes forget to take care of themselves, so I’ve tried to make sure that this doesn’t happen.
Since May I think we’ve both managed to work it out so that there is a healthy balance of mutual love and respect and support happening – so that both of us can get what we need – though it took awhile to find that balance. I also think we are both going to come through this experience much wiser and somehow better people. Cancer wasn’t what either of us expected or wanted to happen, but it turns out that the silver lining is a deepening of our trust and friendship, as well as quite a lot of ‘growing up’ that was long overdue.
Oh, and we did try out the bell one day to see if Nog could hear it in the livingroom if I rang it in the bedroom. The cats damn near jumped out of their fur, so we didn’t try it again. It looks pretty on the bookshelf though.
Thanks Nog, for everything. I don’t know what I’d do without you.
24 Wednesday Sep 2008
Posted in animals & pets, cancer, health & happiness, home
… and after a light snack I’m going to cosy up with cats in bed.
Hasta mañana …
23 Tuesday Sep 2008
Posted in cancer, friends, health & happiness, hospitals, life stuff
The good news is that I did get a room here with the shiny new furniture, including fully-automated bed. Once I’m a bit less dizzy I think I’ll play around more with different bed positions. My very nice roommate Milo checked out this afternoon so I hope I luck out again with whoever moves in this evening. Anyhow, it looks like I’ll be going home on Friday. I’m already sitting up and moving about a little and the doctor says he’s going to remove the IVs tomorrow.
My only really ‘out of it’ day was yesterday after the operation, and I was still feeling really groggy today until the nurse disconnected the morphine. I’m much perkier now. Still haven’t eaten, except for some peach juice that I promptly threw up, which the nurse told me was probably also because of the morphine. I think they’ll be giving me some purée tonight (mmm…) which is actually much better than what they laughingly call chicken broth here. The closest I can come to describing it is ‘hot fatty water’. Perhaps Pipocas can come up with something better – I made her taste some last night. And so, I seem to be recovering much more quickly than last time and yesterday I was very pleased not to have woken up in the ICU. Well, until I found out why. . .
21 Sunday Sep 2008
Posted in cancer, health & happiness, hospitals, life stuff
I’m checking into hospital this afternoon at 6 pm. After all the waiting and upset and fears, the time has finally come. I’m actually feeling okay about it all – much calmer than I was even a few days ago. I guess there’s a sense of just being resigned to going through with it now, especially as there isn’t anything I can do about it – I need to have this surgery and that’s that.
It also really helped having a chat yesterday with friend and neighbour Becky (who runs this fabulous bookshop across the street from casa az ). She’s been through the cancer thing twice now, once for each breast, and she has a very pragmatic view of things that I found I could really relate to. Somehow I felt much better after talking with her.
Nog will be coming with me when I check in (and will also be staying over tonight – in case I start to panic we can always have a game of scrabble to keep my mind off things), and Pipocas is going to stop by after I get unpacked and settled in.
I sure hope I get a room with the new furniture I saw them moving in over the summer – really cool-looking modern beds just like in House! Last time I had a depressing circa 1940’s bed with chipped enamel paint and a hand crank, so I had to rely on passing nurses or visitors to adjust my bed for me. These new ones look to be fully automated and they also have a pulley gizmo, which will make getting into and out of bed much easier. So fingers crossed on that one. I also hope I get a reasonably polite roommate who won’t have the television blaring all day long. It occurred to me that out of the four roommates I had during my last hospital stay not one of them ever took out a book, or even a magazine, to read. Amazing.
Well, time to finish organising and packing up all the stuff I’ll be taking with me: mobile phone, iPod, camera, laptop, DVDs, books, travel scrabble game, notebook, pens, toiletries, bottled water, dressing gown, slippers … wish me luck!!!
casa azahar 
