Category Archives: hope

settling in…

31 Monday Jan 2011

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Here’s Azar sitting next to me on my comfy chair right now while I sit in the middle of the room with the desk wheeled over so I can use my laptop comfortably. Mostly all moved in now although the place is still a total disaster area, with lots and lots of cleaning and organising to do and a few things to get the landlords to fix…

But it actually felt great waking up this morning in my new home. And I’m so pleased to see the cats all curious about their new surroundings – especially Azar. He’s friskier than I’ve seen him in ages. And Peter also seems a bit recharged, in spite of all the physical work he’s been doing this past week, particularly yesterday.

Just one last bit of “leftovers” to shift over from the old place, and take care of changing over the utilities, and tomorrow I will say goodbye forever to the old casa az.

I thought I was going to miss my old place, but when I left it last night without all my stuff  inside I realised that what made it a home was everything I’d put into it. With all that gone it didn’t look so special, just like a place that used to be my home. I’m glad I have the video to remember it fondly, and I will miss the orange trees and the azahar, but there’s so much here to enjoy that I’m sure it’ll all balance out. And anyhow, the orange trees are just five minutes away (and I can also get a small one for my rooftop terrace!).

I have a feeling that living here in a new neighbourhood in this wonderful new apartment is going to be quite an adventure. Earlier today I hung out some clothes to dry in the sun on my terraza and thought … this is home!

p*cking

23 Sunday Jan 2011

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Today Peter and I have officially started packing after having collected a few boxes over the past couple of days. It’s hard to imagine that in a week’s time we may actually be moved… heck, it’s hard to imagine that we’re even going to find enough boxes, let alone get them all packed in time. It’s daunting, to say the least.

I still don’t even know how we’re going to move yet. Options are probably now down to renting a van and getting friends to help. I’m still waiting for estimates from a couple of moving companies but I’m sure they will be way too expensive. As for when, it could really be anytime after Thursday because the apartment is empty and that will give them time to finish painting, cleaning and doing minor repairs. I was hoping for Friday, which would give us the weekend to get settled in. We shall see.

But man – p*cking sucks! When I moved here from Salamanca all my worldly possessions, including two cats, fit neatly into a small hatchback. A year later when I moved from across the street I carried stuff over bit by bit. No furniture, just books, clothes, cats and kitchen stuff. And when I moved here from the apartment next door I didn’t have to pack one box, though I did fill up the laundry basket a few times. Compared to those times this is gonna be hell. On the plus side it’ll give me the chance to get rid of a lot of stuff, and there are lots of bookcases, cupboards and closets at the new place. Though I doubt I’ll ever look back on all this and laugh. Most likely I’ll shudder at the thought and just be thankful it’s over.

fingers crossed!

21 Friday Jan 2011

Posted by in cancer, chemo, hope, hospitals

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Today at 8am I’m having the third PET scan since I got the all-clear in September 2009 after my last chemo finished that summer. Will my luck hold? Will I be okay?

I’m always nervous, if not downright terrified, just before a scan (scanxiety!) but this time was only given two day’s notice, so at least that cut down on the usual anxiety build-up period. Just two nights of lost sleep rather than a week or so. But the really extra anxiety-making thing is that this time I have to go all on my own. Nog has a class and I couldn’t find anyone else to come with me. We’re talking about six hours of scary hospital time with nobody else to talk to.

By the time most of you read this I’ll probably be either in the machine or still at the hospital awaiting the results. I’m really lucky that I don’t have to wait a month after the test for results as my nuclear medicine Team always tell me straight away. The scary thing about that is – if they do find more cancer – they will probably insist I start chemo next week, which would really bugger up my moving plans, as well as the two tapas tours I have booked the first week in February. Of course the even scarier thing would be them telling me that chemo is no longer an option…

Hope I’m back with good news later on!
I know you’re all rooting for me, and that helps.

my new home?

19 Wednesday Jan 2011

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Well, I found it! Just by chance after my friend Flor sent me an email last night saying she’d seen a for rent sign up on a building around the corner from her place. So I called and it sounded wonderful – and also too expensive – but I thought it was worth looking at. And man, it’s perfect. Bigger than I was looking for with three bedrooms instead of two (though really one “bedroom” is more of an office space) and 100 square metres not including the massive terrace. On two floors without the dangerous-for-cats spiral staircase. Clean, freshly painted, unfurnished (yay!). Tons of light everywhere, and balconies. The kitchen has loads of cupboard space, the two bedrooms also have lots of closet and storage space. The drawback? The price! And I am so trying to rationalise and figure out how to say yes to this place. My maximum price was set at 750 euros, a hundred euros more than I’m paying now, but I was hoping for 700. But the thing is, this apartment is actually worth the price. Which is 850 euros, and which the owners say they are willing to lower to 800 euros and guarantee that price for two years.

And so, 50 euros more than my maximum price, and 150 more than I am paying now. To be honest, if Peter was working more and paying his share then I could afford it. This irks, because the whole point of sharing your dwelling is to cut costs – this is not happening for me at the moment. Another option is to rent out the “third bedroom” for a few months until things get sorted, to see if Peter gets his shit together. Because really, if I have to share the place then it makes sense to do it with someone who can actually pay, right? I can put up with three for a short time, but hey, there’s only one bathroom. And I know I can find people willing to take that room here on short-term rental, because the apartment is fantastic. And the owners know I’m in love with it, and have given me first option, though I have to decide this week.

Well, I guess you’re wondering what the place looks like. Here are some pics I took this morning with my iPhone that don’t really do it justice, and the apartment was still in the midst of painting and cleaning, and they’ll be hanging curtains, etc, but you can at least get an idea  (click on all the collages to enlarge)…

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home hunting sucks…

12 Wednesday Jan 2011

Posted by in change, home, hope, sevilla

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I know at least one person who loves apartment hunting, and I suppose if I could afford to pay more and didn’t have a deadline then I might feel less stressed about this. I think I’ve seen over a dozen places now and not one of them felt like it could be home, and I’m getting worried as time runs out that I’ll end up in somewhere I don’t like at all.

This is also hugely time consuming and entire half-days are lost going off to see places when I should hunting for clients.

I guess if I were just looking for another apartment, and not a home, then it would be easier. But I really don’t want to live just anywhere and I sure don’t want to end up in some place with a red kitchen or purple bathroom… there sure are a lot of ugly places out there, at least in my price range.