Monthly Archives: September 2012

strong thoughts

10 Monday Sep 2012

Posted by in cancer, friends, health & happiness, hope, hospitals

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That’s what Pat would say to me… she’d say “strong thoughts”. And I would feel comforted. One of Pat’s avatars – the black-eyed susan.

The black-eyed susans in my avatar represent two things: every-day beauty in spite of adversity, and sheer persistence. At home I have a 4×12 foot border of black-eyed susans around my front patio. Those flowers are the offshoots of a single 4-inch pot I found wilting on the reduced-for-clearance rack at the garden center in 1998. Now even the daylilies have to argue with them for water, sun and space. The black-eyed susans never lose and never quit; they are a simple, beautiful symbol of what my life with cancer survivorship has become: life out loud, no matter what the circumstances or adversities.

This morning I’m going for my umpteenth PET scan (I can’t be bothered counting them right now). But basically I’ve been having them every six months since May 2008. Since September 2009 I have been NED (no evidence of disease). But everytime I go for a PET scan I am terrified. I mean, this time last year Pat never thought it was going to be her last September. With stage IV cancer you just never know what’s going to happen next.

So in a few hours I’m going to find out whether I get yet another “stay of execution” or if I have to start thinking about chemo and other awful possibilities. Been having quite a lot of abdominal pain of late, so of course I’m scared this means the cancer has come back. Scared out of my wits, actually.

Wish me luck!

sunday song – come together

09 Sunday Sep 2012

Posted by in music, sunday song, video

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So there I was lying in bed during the wee hours and listening to the radio when an obvious cover version of Come Together came on. At first I thought “who the hell would have the nerve to do this!” and then I thought “hey, this actually sounds pretty good” and then “hey, I recognise that voice!” I had no idea this version existed. I think it’s fabby.

He one spinal cracker…

more córdoba!

08 Saturday Sep 2012

Posted by in 20th anniversary, spain, travel, trips

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I realised today that I haven’t posted anything here about my trip to Córdoba a couple of weeks ago – the one that caused me so much worry over Azar and leaving him overnight. Well, as you all know he was fine and, as luck would have it, the damn tumour didn’t explode until two days after we got back. I still shudder to think what would have happened if it had burst while we were away…

But it didn’t and Peter and I had a wonderful time. I have to say that Córdoba is becoming one of my favourite places and already I want to go back. I used to say to friends and tapas tour clients that it was a good day trip spot, or at the most overnight, but I each time I go I discover something new and find out there is even more to discover.

And then I run out of time.

This last visit was extra special because I was invited by Hospes Hotels to spend a night in their fabulous five-star Palacio del Bailío and enjoy a flamenco-themed dinner there. So… wow. It was my first ever five-star experience and I sure hope it’s not my last. Everything at the hotel was perfect and the hotel itself has such an interesting history that you feel like you’re staying in a historical monument – which is exactly what it is. Various treasures were discovered during renovations, such as old paintings hidden under wallpaper and Roman ruins in the basement (!!). I could’ve happily not left the hotel during the entire visit, but there were things to check out in town.

Peter came with me as he was doing research for his Córdoba day trips as Seville Concierge. We went to the Mesquita again, as we hadn’t been for a few years, and also to the the Alcázar for the first time. And of course we were keen to try out a couple of restaurants that came highly recommended, only to find that they were both closed for holidays. Instead we happened upon a real find – the world’s first “salmorejería”! Anyhow, I have written and posted photos about the highlights of this fabulous trip in various places, so you can have a look at them if you like. And meanwhile I’ll keep dreaming about returning to Córdoba soon…

My blog post on azahar’s Sevilla: Dreaming in Córdoba

You can see all the hotel photos here: Córdoba | Palacio del Bailío

And other Córdoba pics: Córdoba | August 2012

And if you’re wondering what a salmorejería is… Salmorejería Umami

keeping azar company

06 Thursday Sep 2012

Posted by in animals & pets, cancer, cats, health & happiness, home, hope

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As much as possible I try not to leave Azar on his own, but sometimes both Peter and I have to be out and so I put him in my room to keep the other two from pestering him. He seems to like being under things a lot, like my bed or the tv table, and so when I see him looking restless I help him down from the sofa or bed so he can go where he wants. This morning I found Loki keeping Azar company under the table and it really made me smile.

In other news… just got a call from the hospital and my PET scan will be next Monday at 11.15 (!!!). Wow, that was fast. Scanxiety is already setting in…