Author Archives: azahar

I can’t walk

16 Friday Aug 2024

Posted by in health, health & happiness, knee saga, knees, sevilla, sevilla staycation

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cant walk

Seriously, I cannot walk anymore. I’ve been doing my best to get out and about each day, but this past week I just can’t. It just fucking hurts too much. Even with the cane, even if I walk slowly. The extreme shooting pain in my (front lower left) right knee makes even a short walk around the block an exercise in constant agony. And so I wonder if I should be even trying to walk on that leg if it hurts THAT bad. Because the pain ends up extending down the entire lower leg. The left knee is no picnic either, but compared to this… there’s no comparison.

I can still shuffle around the apartment, more or less. But each time I have to get up to go to the kitchen, the bathroom, whatever, I have to steel myself for the inevitable shooting pain. Even so, I’m still doing my daily chair workouts (yay! thank god for them!). But my next MRI is a whole month away (September 16th) and I honestly don’t know what to do between now and then.

Not only has this put a serious damper on my Staycation (it’s actually pretty depressing and has left me feeling all scatter-brained, unable to concentrate) I’m worried about next month. I have some tours booked in those first couple of weeks, but… a four hour walking tour? Srsly?? I mean, I know we’re not walking the whole time, but that’s an easy 8,000 steps. I could probably still do the wine tastings as it would mean ONLY hobbling down to Morales and back again. But the tours? How? Going to the supermarket almost has me in tears.

I’ve been icing the area, using different anti-inflammatory creams, keeping up with the chair exercises, but every day it’s getting worse. What I need is a proper diagnosis and then a plan of action… treatment? physio? surgery? I just need to know something. Not knowing what is happening is really dragging me down. Anyhow, just venting today because being stuck inside and the constant pain is really getting to me. xx

PS
for those asking… I can’t take anti-inflammatory meds like Ibuprofen due to my BP, and I won’t live on a steady diet of pain killers. I just won’t.

the brothers sun

14 Wednesday Aug 2024

Posted by in television

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brothers sun

Just finished watching The Brothers Sun and was sad to find out that Netflix didn’t renew it for another season. I found it so entertaining, great cast and writing, compelling characters. When I see what else Netflix has to offer at the moment it seems clear they are only about “the numbers” not about quality. Shame.

But some happy news… Slow Horses Season 4 is coming up soon!

the great pumpkin

13 Tuesday Aug 2024

Posted by in food & drink, sevilla, spain, tapas bars

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great pumpkin (1)

Here’s Peter with a pumpkin that weighs more than he does. We stopped in for a snack at Doña Emilia yesterday, which is the riverside restaurant/tapas bar of the Manolo Mayo family. This 100 kilo specimen was apparently their runner-up in the largest veg-fruit competition held annually in Los Palacios (where the Mayo family is from and where they have their original restaurant and their own vegetable garden). So the even bigger pumpkin and giant watermelons (also winners) stayed in Los Palacios.

great pumpkin (2)

staycation (almost over!)

12 Monday Aug 2024

Posted by in health, hope, sevilla, sevilla staycation, spain

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final stretch

So this is the home stretch, the final three weeks of my Staycation, which officially began on July 8th, so eight whole weeks in total (my next tours are booked for the first week in September). Although I could ill afford taking so much time off I chose to do it because 1) I needed a break, a serious “time out” to hopefully sort out what to do next and 2) I can barely walk anymore. I had a few vague plans and ideas, I had some hope…

And well, I can’t say I didn’t end up achieving any of my goals as most of them were so vague that it would be hard to know if they were achieved or not, but I do feel a bit disappointed that not much has changed. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve really enjoyed this time off, just being able to do WHATEVER when I got up in the morning. And I’m still doing the daily workouts. But as for the rest… I dunno. I’m not even very sure about what I thought might happen, though I did hope the time out would help give me some clarity. Nope.

Anyhow, three more weeks then back to work. That is IF I can walk. There are okay days and then some really not okay days. Like today. I tried walking down to the river and back (not far) and I was almost crying from the stabbing pain in my right knee. One good thing is that I got the appointment for my MRI… September 16th! So there’s a bit of hope. I may just develop a what-the-hell approach for these last three weeks, meaning just fuck it all and stop even thinking that I need to be accomplishing or improving or changing anything. Just be. Maybe I should have been doing this all along. How’s your summer going?