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Category Archives: cancer

scanxiety

28 Monday Jun 2010

Posted by azahar in cancer, health & happiness, hope, hospitals

≈ 25 Comments

Tags

cancer, PET scans

After ALL THAT WAITING it’s finally time for the next PET scan today. My appointment is for 8am, which is very good as it means I will be the first one in. Had one 3pm appointment last year and ended up having to wait two hours just to be put in the comfy chair to have the FDG injected (after that it’s about a 3-4 hour process). Also, it’s crap waiting all day at home to go for the test – much better to just get up and go in the morning and look forward to having that first coffee after the first scan has been done (they usually put me through twice, though last time it was three times).

I’ve had pretty bad scanxiety this time. I really don’t think I could cope with having to go on chemo again, though of course that’s not even the worst case scenario. I worry they might find tumours in untreatable places … the walking time bomb feeling  just doesn’t go away. And of course it gets worse as it gets closer to scan time. So I’ve pretty much been a nervous wreck this past month, though I’ve mostly been able to enjoy myself, especially these past couple of weeks. Until yesterday.

Gaelen, I know that your strong thoughts will be there with me.
Jed, make sure those wonder twin powers are fully activated, okay?

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I love it when a plan comes together…

21 Monday Jun 2010

Posted by azahar in cancer, food & drink, friends, geekiness, health & happiness, hope, internet, juggling, life stuff, photos, sevilla, work

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

blogs, internet, work

… or in my case, several plans.

I didn’t realise what a turning point the trip to Málaga would turn out to be. So again, thanks to everyone who made it possible for me to go without racking up more credit card debt. In the end I only spent money on train fare and two lunches out, so it was a fairly cheap trip, but very rich in experiences. I think it also helped to have a couple of days on my own – and being by the sea certainly helped!

Anyhow, these are the various projects I’ve been working on since I got off chemo last summer: tapas tours, Seville website & blog (with forum), social media management, the Sevilla Store, and English classes (specifically for restaurants). So far the only ones bringing in a bit of income are the tapas tours and social media stuff – my private English classes, such as they were, finished last week for the summer. But it does look as though things are coming together…

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waiting…

15 Tuesday Jun 2010

Posted by azahar in cancer, health & happiness, hospitals, summer

≈ 16 Comments

Tags

cancer, PET scans

Ever since my oncology appointment on May 24th I’ve been waiting to hear when my next PET scan will be. I’d been told it was going to be sometime during the first half of June and, frankly, I’ve been a nervous wreck all month. Then on Friday one of The Team told me the PET would definitely be this week and the hospital would call me on Monday (yesterday) to confirm. And well, they did call. But I was told my PET would be on Monday June28th. Two whole weeks away. Which I suppose won’t make much difference in terms of my health (if there are tumours it’s doubtful they will grow significantly in two weeks) … but dammit. I’ve been trying to get my work organised and the summer planned and had hoped to know at the beginning of June whether I was going to have a cancer-&-chemo-free summer.

Now I won’t know until July.

This sucks.

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last will & testament

10 Thursday Jun 2010

Posted by azahar in cancer, death & dying, internet, life stuff, media

≈ 6 Comments

Tags

death, internet, social media, wills

Remember when I was wondering what would happen to all my online stuff when I die?

Well, Lisa over at Cybercoven took it further and actually wrote up a will protecting her writing. She downloaded Neil Gaiman’s simple will for creative people, made a few changes, and now has all her stuff in order.

So I am now going to do the same. I don’t really have any intellectual property to protect, but I would like to know that my blogs and social media stuff won’t just be left stuck out there. I’ve already had an offer from someone willing to take care of Sevilla Tapas. For the rest I’ll mostly need someone to either maintain or delete accounts. Feels weird to be doing this but I think it’s better to deal with it while I am still well & healthy.

How about you – have you made a will?

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five jobs, no income…

02 Wednesday Jun 2010

Posted by azahar in cancer, change, home, hope, life stuff, spain, work

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

jobs, work

Will work for money too!

Srsly … hire me?

f_grovel.gif

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