28 Monday Aug 2023
Posted in health
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I had to work today and really appreciated that at Casa Román they prepared a simple bacalao a la plancha for me while my tapas tour guests enjoyed their crispy bacalao frito. I’m determined that this is GOING TO WORK this time. Though to be honest I did follow all the colonoscopy dietary rules last time too. No idea what went wrong unless there is some kind of scary blockage somewhere. Anyhow, three more days to go…
23 Wednesday Aug 2023
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Since the last botched procedure in April I’ve been waiting for an appointment for another colonoscopy and finally got the call today… it will be next Thursday (!!). So not much time to fret but just enough time to prep for the prep. This time I’m going to start the low-residual diet a day early (Sunday) and basically try to eat as little as possible next week. ALSO, this time I have the prep instructions from the hospital (last time I had to look them up online) and it’s a bit different from what I did, so maybe that was the reason I ended up “badly prepped”?
These instructions have three different options depending on the time of the appointment (the others only had morning and afternoon options and my appointment was at noon, same as next week). So I will follow the “midday instructions” and do the usual thing with the SOLUCIÓN EVACUANTE the evening before but also get up extra early and take more of the stuff, being sure to finish six hours before my appointment, at which point I’m not even allowed water. I sure hope it works this time, and also that they don’t find anything scary. 🤞
12 Wednesday Apr 2023
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Well fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck and fuck again. It all seemed to be going so smoothly. After yesterday’s prep with the SOLUCIÓN EVACUANTE I felt ready to go and so it was off to the hospital. I was quite surprised to discover they were going to totally knock me out for the procedure (on previous occasions I was just given a light sedative). But in went the needle, in went the probe and then suddenly I was awake again. At first I thought, hey that was a piece of cake. But then I got the news. That I was going to have to do it all over again. Why? Because of “poor preparation”. I tell ya, I almost cried. But the nurse was actually lovely and when I explained that I did everything I was supposed to do, followed all the instructions, just like other times, she said that sometimes it happens.
For the record. I did the low-residue diet for three days. And on the day before the procedure I stuck to only clear liquids until the evening when I started with the dread SOLUCIÓN EVACUANTE. Five hours later that was (finally) done. I had a bit more water and went to bed. Woke up parched but wasn’t allowed to drink before the procedure so I didn’t. I’m telling you I DID EVERYTHING RIGHT. So why didn’t it work this time? Honestly I felt like they were judging me, thinking I probably cheated on the diet or didn’t take all of the solution. Other than the kind nurse.
So now… I don’t know. I’ve sent an email to the oncology secretary to explain the report they will be receiving shortly. And also to ask what happens now? Not sure if they will just reschedule another colonoscopy or if I will have to go in and see the oncologist again first. I feel so deflated now. Kind nurse told me this really isn’t that unusual and most likely when I redo it they will either give me a different prep solution or have me go on liquids for 2-3 days instead of just one. Or both. None of which I am looking forward to. Has this ever happened to you?
10 Monday Apr 2023
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Since I’m apparently not allowed any more scans the oncologist agreed last September that I could have another colonoscopy as my last one was five years ago. It was supposed to be in February but then I finally heard from the hospital three weeks ago and they told me the appointment was for March 22nd – the day of Morcilla’s operation! So I asked if they could reschedule and now it will be this Wednesday at noon. Eep.
I’ve been on the low residual diet since Saturday and tomorrow it will be clear liquids all day until I have to start with the dread SOLUCIÓN EVACUANTE at 6 pm. To be honest, I’m a bit worried about this one because I’ve been having a fair bit of abdominal pain and general discomfort lately but was so caught up with all the cat trauma of the past month that I couldn’t allow myself to think about it much. So I guess it’s a good thing I’m getting the test done and hopefully it will turn out fine and put my mind at rest. Fingers crossed! 🤞
13 Thursday Feb 2020
Posted in cancer, friends, health & happiness, hospitals
So there I was, up at 6.00 am in order to prepare for the prep… which began at 6.30. Four fucking litres of this vile solution, downed in 250ml doses every 15 minutes over 4 hours. After the first hour is when the fun starts. I was amazed that I was actually able to down all 16 doses, but after awhile nothing mattered anymore, so what the fuck, what was one more disgusting oral and anal experience? After that I had to spend 4 hours not drinking even one drop of water. You’d think that by this point I’d have had enough liquid to last me, but as I’d also lost a lot of liquid I was actually quite thirsty, and I’m not used to going that long without water.
Anyhow… got a taxi over to the hospital with my friend Paz. These days I go to as many hospital visits on my own as possible, but this one required that I be accompanied because they administer a mild sedative. In this case it wasn’t that mild! A dolantin-valium cocktail totally knocked me out and I woke up again an hour later going – wut? By then it was all over and they were wheeling me into the recovery room. Seriously I don’t ever remember being knocked out so completely during any previous colonoscopy/endoscopy procedures. Maybe it was the sleep deprivation? Whatever, it was done and – YAY! – I was told that there were no signs of cancer and I was good to go.
And so I went, with Paz, for a long walk over to the Huerta de Rey Moro, a community garden where some of her family were having a birthday party for one of her many nephews. Grabbed a cold beer, hung out with the family for awhile and then decided – fuck I’m hungry! I mean, it had been over 36 hours since my last bite. So I wandered over to Eslava for a snack and also to just feel normal again. These hospital things really take it out of me, so I got back into my element, chatting with the barmen, doing a bit of Instagramming… and after that I was ready to go home. It was such a relief to open my door to three hungry cats, feed them, put on my PJs and get ready for a cosy evening at home. BUT THEN THIS HAPPENED… (stay tuned)…
casa azahar 