Tag Archives: hospitals

there and back again…

22 Thursday Jul 2010

Posted by in cancer, food & drink, friends, health & happiness, hospitals

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Pilar & Isabel
2/3 of my fabulous nuclear medicine team

Made personal history yesterday by going to The Hospital for an oncology appointment … ALL BY MYSELF. I’d called all my usual hospital buddies and they were either away on holiday or, like Nog,  not able to get away from work because of the very inconvenient appointment time – 1.45. This also meant that I would be at the tail end of the typical morning’s backup and could expect an extra long wait. You can probably imagine how much I was dreading this. But in the end I decided to take the bull with the corns (a wonderful malapropism from an old student of mine) and do something about this instead of feeling scared and helpless. And so…

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well, this was unexpected

05 Monday Jul 2010

Posted by in health & happiness, hospitals

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The last thing I expected to be doing this morning was hanging out at the hospital for six hours. So much for “only” three visits this month. But in fact, it all started about 25 years ago, back when I was living in Toronto.

I was at the gym and bent over to pick up my towel and my heart suddenly started racing like mad. Scared the hell out of me. And I was so scared two hours later when it hadn’t stopped that I ended up going to Emergency. Of course while I was in the waiting room my heart rate went back to normal. Since then I’ve had this happen on quite a regular basis, though I learned that if I lie down and pull my knees to my chest then the tachycardia stops. I’ve been to specialists, have had numerous EKGs, and once even wore a little “heartbeat recorder” for a couple of days, but nobody could discover why this happened to me. The usual trigger is me being overheated and/or bending over – it’s like flicking a switch. And it usually stops just as suddenly if I lie down.

Except last night it didn’t…

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a good day

25 Tuesday May 2010

Posted by in cancer, chemo, food & drink, friends, hope, hospitals, neighbours, sevilla, work

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After all was said and done my “scary” hospital day yesterday turned out quite well. I’d got up early for yoga class and tried to keep busy doing biz stuff at home later, but I was getting more and more nervous as the day went on. And it was silly because I KNEW that this oncology appointment was just going to be about setting up my next PET scan, but unlike going to get my port flushed out (which I can now do on my own!), actually having to talk to the oncologist makes the whole cancer thing feel more real and threatening somehow. But it went well. Had a nice chat with doctor Ana and, after a bit of consternation on her part, she agreed to let me have the scan early in June, which was what I’d been hoping for. I have so many things on the go that I want to know as soon as possible if I’m going to be okay for the next few months. Also, if this next scan is clean, it’ll be the first summer in three years that I haven’t been on chemo…

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another hospital day…

22 Monday Feb 2010

Posted by in animals & pets, cancer, cats, death & dying, hospitals

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Got my appointment with Dr Ana the oncologist today at 5pm. Meanwhile, Azar has been all floppy and unwell over the weekend, so I will have to take him to the vet’s this morning and I’m worried sick. Could it be a delayed reaction to the vaccination? Is he dying? I can’t help but think of my last oncology appointment on November 17th and how that same morning I’d taken Sunny to the vet’s … and then that night he lay dying in my arms. I mean, hospital days totally suck anyhow without all this extra crap. So much for taking things easy and preparing myself for my next hospital visit.

I’m a wreck. Azar is not well.
I am not coping.
Fuck.

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hospital day

17 Tuesday Nov 2009

Posted by in cancer, health & happiness, hospitals

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doctor cat Well, an afternoon really.

I have my check-up with the oncologist later on today and either before or after that I’ll be going to get my port flushed, and then go to emergency to get my eyeballs looked at. That weird flashing prism thing happened again on Sunday evening, though it didn’t last as long as the first time. Agustín had told me to go directly to emergency if it happened again, but since I had to be there today anyhow I decided to wait.

I should find out when my next scan is going to be, and whether it will be a CT or a PET. I don’t have many hospital buddies anymore, so Nog is going to come with me for the oncologist appointment and hopefully won’t have to leave before we get in. The appointment is for 5.00 and he has a class at 6.30, so if I’m lucky there won’t be too much of a wait. But I’ll probably end up doing the port and going to emergency on my own. So watch for me on Twitter!

I really really hate hospitals, especially when I’m alone.

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