Category Archives: hope

pat in sevilla

12 Saturday May 2012

Posted by in cancer, friends, hope, sevilla, spain, tapas, travel, trips, video

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Dearest Pat,

The other day after reading your very moving post No More Room in the Bucket I kind of fell apart. Even though you had told me that you’d stopped treatment – and although I knew exactly what that meant – I guess a part of me just couldn’t accept it. It was only after reading your blog post (published on the same day I wrote here about still being NED) that it finally struck home. Especially when I read this bit…

“There is no more room in the bucket for big dreams like cross-country train trips. I feel a pang watching tv shows set in NYC, knowing that I’ll likely never visit my favorite city again. It aches to see puppies and kittens and know I’ll never own another one. I’ve never tasted foie gras, or truffles, or uni. I never got to visit the Food Network. I’ll never meet my friend Shawn in person or visit her in Seville, Spain.”

And well, I knew straight away that I had to take you out for tapas!

This video was made on the fly on Thursday with my poky pocket video cam and so my clips turned out pretty rough (one clip showing us having some grilled foie and tuna belly at La Azotea was unsalvageable, but oh well…). Luckily my friend Juan Tarquini not only offered to invite us for tapas at his fabulous Vineria San Telmo, he also very generously edited and polished all my rough cuts into something quite wonderful that I could never have done on my own. I hope it will make you smile.

Everyone really enjoyed meeting you and plying you with fabulous food and drink. It was actually quite an amazing day and I know you touched a lot of hearts here during your brief visit in Sevilla. You will always live in mine.

te quiero Amiga,
Shawn xx

For those of you who don’t already know, I met Pat Steer on the Colon Club forum just after being diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer, when all this was new to me and I was scared and looking for helpful information. Pat had been diagnosed four years before me. She became my sister, my friend, my hero. I love her with all my heart.

extremo… or posible?

11 Sunday Mar 2012

Posted by in food & drink, hope, restaurants, sevilla, spain, tapas, tapas tours

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Yesterday was a bit of a blur as I had – for the first time ever – two tapas tours in one day. Talk about Tapeo Extremo! First a regular Sevilla Tapas Tour at lunch time and then a Gourmet Tapas Tour in the evening. And both went fantastically well. Met lovely people, had an amazing time with great food & wine & conversation. Ended up quite zonked but happy. Very happy.

So I now have a new goal, which is to set up this gastronomy tour biz properly, inspired by Twitter pal Gabriella Ranelli who runs Tenedor Tours in San Sebastian. As most of you know, I’ve been testing the waters since getting off chemo and back to work, but haven’t felt quite ready to bite the bullet and start up a new company with all the extra time and expense that would entail, especially as so far it’s just been a very part-time gig. But if things keep going well I think it may be time to start doing this as a proper full-time job.

Tomorrow I have another double-whammy day coming up with both lunchtime and evening tours – for the second time ever!! – but then nothing for a couple of weeks. Still, it’s quite exciting to think I could actually make this work. Will keep you posted…

chemo port cleaning

06 Tuesday Mar 2012

Posted by in cancer, health & happiness, hope, hospitals

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It was that time of the month again today – chemo port cleaning time! It’s actually been a bit better since they changed their system and I go to the blood lab next to the main hospital building rather than the room where everyone is getting their chemo infusions done. Doesn’t *quite* feel so much like going to the hospital. But I still taxi there and back. A bit of a splurge, but it takes the edge off by going in comfort rather than having to get on a crowded bus, etc.

So after today’s procedure (you can see a tiny white bandaid in my cleavage there – dig that crazy shirt!) I decided to pop over to the Nuclear Medicine department to see if either Ricardo or Isabel were there and ask them if I could get a copy of my last PET scan results. Ended up having a nice visit with Ricardo, talking about travelling and this & that. Finally got around to discussing the whole cancer thing and when he asked how I was feeling I said I felt quite okay, but also felt I should be taking better care of myself. His reply was that we all should and that, although I still have this thing looming over my head, something else could come along and “get me” so probably best to just get on with things and not dwell on it. And you know what? He’s right. He’s also one of the very few people on the planet who could actually say that to me and not make me want to rip their head off.

But the chemo port cleaning is a monthly reminder that I have this port imbedded inside me FOR A REASON. Which is that I’m still considered very high risk for recurrance. Hard not to think of that sometimes, but today talking with Ricardo helped.

Now I’m off to meet a group of 8 people from Thailand and take them on a tapas tour!

What did you do today?

my home team

08 Wednesday Feb 2012

Posted by in cancer, cats, friends, hope, hospitals

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Right, I’m really scared. Will I be spared for another six months or has my luck finally run out? Also, the PET scan is in a different place this time, so no Team there, nothing familiar. I’m not even sure where it is, so will take a taxi. I think María Paz is coming with me but she has a bad cold and might not be able to make it, and Peter is working, so I might end up going all alone. But at least I’ll know that my Home Team will be here waiting for me.

See you on the other side…

new towels

31 Tuesday Jan 2012

Posted by in cancer, home, hope, retail therapy

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I love new towels, but have yet in my life been able to buy the sort of towels I would really love to have (same deal goes with sheets). And as I can usually get by with worn out old towels – in other words, they are seldom a priority – it isn’t until they start getting a bit transparent that I go out in search of new ones. Best time for that here is during the after-Christmas or summer sales. Like now!

This is one of the many up-sides to having a working roommate who can pay his way – that there is actually enough money to buy stuff like this without it being such a big deal.

Also, since the whole cancer thing, I don’t tend to spend money on *stuff* unless it’s something very useful that would improve day-to-day quality of life. Heck, I haven’t even bothered to get my teeth fixed after losing fillings in two of them simply because there’s not that much money to go around and I’d rather spend it on experiences and enjoying life. Like going out for tapas, taking short trips, things like that. Oh, and an iPad. Maybe.

As usual, so much is hinging on the results of the next PET scan. It’s so stressful living in these six-month cancer-free stretches of time, never knowing if the next scan will bring bad news, never knowing how far I can plan ahead. And if anyone tells me I should THINK POSITIVE… well, just don’t, okay? You have no idea what this is like.

Meanwhile, the new towels are lovely and soft…